


How to say “I love you”

by Tomomi



Category: Bravely Default (Video Game) & Related Fandoms
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Pining, ringatiz, so much pining, tizabel - Freeform, v gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-13
Packaged: 2019-03-30 15:54:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13954953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tomomi/pseuds/Tomomi
Summary: There were many ways to say these three little words, but they can't seem to figure it out.





	How to say “I love you”

**_How To Say “I Love You”_ **

 

**_xoxoxo_ **

Florem was  _ far _  too lively, Tiz concluded as he laid upon his bed. He stared up at the ceiling and listened to the muffled laughter and chatter that wandered about outside the inn. The team had only stayed in Florem for a few days, yet he was already wishing to leave. The lights were too bright, people were too loud, and the streets were absolutely appalling.

It was hard enough for him to catch some shut-eye with his nightly frights. Even when his body would naturally pass out due to fatigue, he’d still wake up with less rest than before. It had become an abysmal routine that he couldn’t break.

Thankfully, Edea and Ringabel were off to enjoy everything the country had to offer and Agnès would stay at the inn sorting weapons and supplies. This left Tiz with a much needed moment’s rest. It would be somewhat peaceful, at least.

“You know, Tiz,” an all too chipper voice chimed from the other side of the room. He lifted his head towards the voice and saw Ringabel merrily throwing on one of his boots, most likely getting ready for a night of amorous escapades- a hobby Tiz could never understand. “Scowling like that is sure to get you some awful frown lines. I’d stop sulking if I were you.” He left the room and slipped into the bathroom.

“Ah… sorry.” Tiz said softly, pushing himself up with his elbows. He had been laying there for so long he hadn’t noticed how much he was moping. The lack of sleep was quickly turning him bitter. It might be easy to distract one’s self of their woes during the day, where jobs must be done and goals must be met, but it’s difficult to keep a smile once night falls over. Ringabel seemed to disprove this very point, as he returned to the room with a delighted stride.

Tiz couldn’t help his judging eye and shook his head. “I can take a guess as to where you’re off to.”

“Oh, don’t look at me that way. Do you know where we are?” Ringabel asked eagerly, prompting a sigh out of the bumpkin. He’s heard this little spiel countless other times. “We’re in the heart of Florem! Where there’s not a dull color in sight and the women flourish in its beauty! What sort of man would pass up such an opportunity?”

“I would.” Tiz said bluntly before he laid back down on the sheets and pulled a pillow over his face. He heard approaching footsteps and felt extra weight fall onto the bed. Moments later he felt the pillow being lifted off his face, leaving him to lazily peer up at the man above him.

Tiz reached up and tried to snatch the pillow back, but it kept being yanked just out of his reach. He dropped his hand and sent a glare his way. “Do you mind?”

“Please, Tiz, you’re far too serious!” He daringly threw the pillow off to the side of the room. Tiz rolled his eyes, falling back down on the bed. He felt the bed shift and felt the presence of another body by his side. The corners of his mouth tugged up into a smile. There’s no winning with this man.

“It’s barely sundown. Surely you aren’t going to stay here and sleep the whole time.” Ringabel pestered on, gazing down at weary eyes.

Tiz pressed his lips tight. “I have nothing else to do… and I’m used to sleeping in early.” Ringabel wondered just how tired he truly was- the poor man never spoke on his past, but even he could see just how jaded he was becoming.

Of course, he wasn’t one to push on a touchy subject, especially seeing how bleak Tiz’s past truly was. Nonetheless, it bothered him knowing that he was throwing around a fake smile at the group- and it was actually fooling them. Edea, as far as he knew, had little to do with the shepherd. Agnès and him seemed rather close, but she was too busy with her own affairs to pay attention to his growing problems.

Ringabel could see his growing discomfort with each place they stayed. In Caldisla, Tiz slept peacefully, but would suddenly wake with memories of the neighboring chasm. In Ancheim, the heat was unbearable to gain proper rest. The beds were dusty and unclean, he even slept on the floor sometimes.

“ _ Well _ , I doubt you’ll be able to catch any moment’s rest  _ here _ .” Ringabel made a general gesture to all around him, and the younger of the two knew he was right. “So, why don’t we have a night on the town?”

“I think your nights are better faired  _ alone,  _ Ringabel.” Tiz shot back, narrowing his eyes. The other scoffed.

“ _ Please,  _ do you think I’m that crude? I have the most innocent intentions!” Ringabel wrapped an arm around him and grinned, seeing a small smile work it’s way onto the other’s face as well.

“I suppose I can go.” Tiz shrugged, darting a glance at his friend.

“Great news! It’s about time us men had some bonding time away from the ladies, huh?”

\--

“Exactly what part of this has been exempt from girls?” Tiz asked as he was perched alongside a large set of Begonias and other flowers he had no clue about. He watched as Ringabel scrambled to handle the pair of girls that buzzed about him like dying bees. He clearly wasn’t listening, so Tiz trailed off to another side of the shop with a roll of his eyes.

He looked around him at all the blossoms and blooms, feeling slightly out of place. They all looked certainly beautiful, save or a few. Not only that, quite pricey too! How would you even choose? Ringabel was muttering something about arranging them between size, color and meaning, but that seemed so impossible with how many there were!

Shaking his head, he reached over and picked up some magenta colored flowers and one oddly colored. Small, yet bright, it has a grossly dark middle and light outline. He supposed the yellow would be a nice contrast? Crystals, how was he supposed to know? What would he even do with these flowers? He wouldn’t be able to work up the courage to give it to a girl, not that he’d want to anyway considering how everyone seemed to act in this town.

Next he saw some banana-shaped flowers that caught his eye. They were a radiant purple, tiny at that, and came in what looked like hundreds at a time. They seemed pretty so he picked them up and added them to his bundle.

“I’m sorry but, what do you think you’re doing?” A voice startled him from behind. He turned around and saw a rather muddled looking Ringabel- and what a surprised, nothing in his arms.

“What happened to  _ your  _ bundle?” Tiz teased as the other man gave a whine.

“The ladies got the best of me, I’m afraid. Those flowers were meant for the the two back at the inn but, alas, fate spoke otherwise.” Ringabel wearily sighed.

Tiz cocked an eyebrow. “I’m not sure it was fate that spoke otherwise.”

“Yeah, yeah, anyway; I hope you’re not planning to give those to anyone.” Ringabel pointed to his… interesting bouquet.

“Okay, so I’m not an expert on flowers. I still think they look… nice?” Tiz’s sentence broke apart as the blonde kept shaking his head. “Come on, they look nice!”

“Put those down! Allow me to tutor you the language of flowers.” He proclaimed, snatching the bouquet and putting them elsewhere, much to Tiz’s discontent. “...and perhaps a lessons on assortment would do. You’re acquainted with wildlife, how is this not second nature to you?”

“I was a farmer not a gardener.” Tiz corrected, crossing his arms. He softened his gaze. “So, how do you tell what flowers mean?”

“Oh, you just know.” Ringabel chuckled. “I’m kidding. There’s many factors that play into their meaning. Size, shape, and most importantly color. Think of them as women-”

A huff of annoyance.

“No, really! Trust me! You see, women come in different size, shape, and color- yet they all are beautiful in their own individual way, all with different personalities. Now, I would  _ love  _ to give all the beautiful women in this world the time of my day and undying attention, but it’s just not that simp-”

“What’s the point of this analogy?” Tiz butted in, jabbing a finger into the man’s back. Ringabel pivoted on his heel and met eyes with his friend’s, equally jabbing a finger into his shoulder.

“ _ The point is  _ under no circumstances do you join Pansies and Petunias with Hyacinths!” He scolded, but it only earned him a fit of laughter, one that he very well didn’t appreciate. But Ringabel dropped his sour face. He was happy to finally catch a genuine laugh out of Tiz, even if it was at his expense.

Once he stopped laughing, Ringabel cleared his throat.

“Are you done?” He asked, trying to hold back his own smile. He was never good at feigning anger.Tiz nodded, covering his mouth with his hand and stifling a few giggles. “Good. You see, once you learn to read a flowers meaning, you can gather any heart you please.”

Tiz rolled his eyes. “I’m sure it’s that easy.”

“Ahem. Well, charming words certainly help.” Ringabel quickly added. He placed a finger on his chin, thinking for a moment, before he turned around and placed a hand on Tiz’s shoulder. “I suppose the best way to learn would be a hands on approach.”

“Hands on-?” Tiz was quickly pulled over to the side and placed near the entrance of the shop.

“Perfect, now, all you have to do is stand here and wait.” Ringabel instructed while holding him at that spot. “Just pretend you are a wandering woman, alone with nothing but her thoughts.”

“W-what?! But, wait, where are you-” And the man was gone before he could finish his sentence. Tiz waited a few moments for him to come back; no such luck. He sighed and took a few steps towards the streets. He saw countless people walking and chattering, entering different shops and leaving with bags full of expensive clothing. How was everyone able to stay so energized every night? It seemed as though they weren’t even human!

He felt his eyes starting to hurt by all the bright street lights and colors, so he directed his attention to the night sky above him. Not a single star in sight- a shame. He remembered when he used to look up at the Sky in Norende; the sky was illuminated with gorgeous specs, all of which he took for granite. He closed his eyes and gave a small sigh.

“What’s taking Ringabel so long?” He asked himself in a soft voice.

“I didn’t realize I kept you waiting.” Came again from behind him. Tiz turned to the voice only to get a faceful of flowers shoved to him. He scrambled to hold them properly without dropping.

“I apologize for the simplicity, but I couldn’t imagine you with anything else.” Ringabel smiled. Tiz stared at him in bewilderment, then looked down to get a good look at the bouquet. The flowers were, indeed, simplistic. All were creamy and light on the eyes. One in particular was larger than the rest, sitting as the centerpiece. It was surrounded by light pink frilly flowers, and spotted all around were these white bud-type things and Tiz had absolutely no idea what was going on.

“What.. I…?” He stuttered.

“The middle is called a Peony. Can you guess what it means?” Ringabel stepped forward, pulling out the flower slightly to get a better view.

“Uhh…” Tiz stared at it for a moment before shrugging. “I don’t know?”

“Well, how does it make you feel?” He pressed further.

“Um…” Tiz blushed. He knew this was just Ringabel showing off, but he couldn’t help but feel warm and tingly. “I suppose it makes me feel happy…” He said, a lot more quietly. “What about these?” He felt the small white flowers.

"Baby Breaths! A fabulous choice by yours truly! Do you like them?” Ringabel asked, turning his head slightly to look at his work. He watched Tiz give a subtle nod, leaning in to smell the bundle he was holding. His eyes slowly closed as he smelled them and he took in the different smells they gave off. Had Ringabel not pulled the bouquet away, he’d have stuck his whole face in.  _ Absolutely adorable. _

What wasn’t adorable, was the solemn look that suddenly overtook the bumpkin’s face. “It’s getting pretty late.” Tiz suddenly said, stepping back as if there was a sickness between them. Ringabel watched him carefully before shaking his head.

“I don’t suppose I said something wrong, did I?” He asked, being delicate with his choice of words.

“What? Oh, no it’s got nothing to do with you.” Tiz replied with hesitation. “I was just thinking about… my parents.”

“Ah… were they fond of this sort of thing?” Ringabel asked again, noting a small sliver of pain strikethrough his eyes. The other, yet again, gave a shrug.

“Yeah. It just brought back memories, I guess.”

“Well, I apologize fo-” A quick wave of a hand cut him off.

“No. Don’t apologize. It’s not a bad thing.” Tiz gave a quick smile before taking a headstart back to the inn. Ringabel watched him walk off with curious eyes, giving a small hum to himself as he trailed behind at a decent pace. They made their way back to the inn, not much later than Edea’s return. The others had already left for bed, or at least they were getting ready for bed.

“See what happens when you don’t waste the night away? We had fun tonight.” Ringabel grinned as he threw his empty wallet on the nightstand.

“Yeah, but now I’m really tired.” Tiz yawned. “I don’t know how you manage to gather up that much energy to do that so often.”

“You’re acting as if it’s the dead of the night, Tiz.” Ringabel shook his head, tutting. “Honestly, I’m just trying to shine a little light on you. Otherwise you’re quite dull.”

Tiz found himself lying back against the covers and shutting his eyes, giving a small hum as his answer. His eyes shot open when he felt something fall beside him. He turned to see the flowers Ringabel had picked out for him. “You actually bought them?”

“As I said, I’m only trying to shine a little light onto you.” Ringabel shrugged, spinning on his heel and making his way towards the nightstand to retrieve his clothes. “Do with them as you please!” He added, rummaging through the small drawer and pulling out some more comfortable sleepwear.  _ And please do take care of them, in honor of my wallet. _

“And, of course, if you ever want to head out again, I’d be more tha-” He started again, only to turn around and see that the boy had already fallen asleep. “-happy to.” He finished pitifully. He stepped over to get a better look at him. They couldn’t have been out  _ that  _ late, could they? It hardly felt like an hour had passed. He shook his head in disbelief.

“Mm..” He heard from below, throwing his thought away. He watched as Tiz nuzzled his face within the bouquet, muttering something incomprehensible to his ears. Not that he needed to know. He wasn’t one to pry. He chuckled, leaning over to ruffle his hair a little.  _ Absolutely adorable. _

**_xoxo_ **

The gang stayed at Yulyana’s every now and again. Ringabel chatted him up until the wee hours of the night- of course, what other than women. Tiz was finally able to get a few nights of proper rest with the help of the peaceful sounds of the water passing through the stream and the faint chatter of the crickets. Though, his comfort was short lived. His anxiety crept up on him once more and he couldn’t close his eyes without turning to every little rustle and croak. Most nights, he ended up listening to the idle chatter between Ringabel and the old man.  

Sometimes their conversations would take a turn for the worst and he would choose to ignore them. Edea and Agnès would head off to bed pretty early, so he would just sit and get lost in his lonely thoughts. Sometimes he would lay down and silently weep until the crack of dawn. No one called him out on it, so he assumed no one knew.

One night he found himself lost in the pages of the D’s journal. He read over each page, captivated by the writing and oblivious to its meaning. He was too scared to touch the words, as if he might smudge the pen, although the ink was long dry for who knows how long.

“I’d kindly ask you for my permission before going through my belongings.” Tiz jumped and turned to the sudden voice. His heart rested easy when he saw that it was Ringabel himself. He handed him back the book without so much as a second’s glance at his eyes.

“Lay off the grim face, I was only kidding.” Ringabel chuckled and placed his hand on his shoulder. He could see how uneasy he was becoming. “You’ve become far too tense.”

Tiz gave an uneasy sigh and slumped his shoulders. “For good reason.” Despite the warm air, he had to hold back a shiver. He brought his knees up to his chest and looked forward. His eyes were heavy and dry, but he couldn’t bring himself to close them- in fear of something he couldn’t describe, lost in endless paranoia.

“These past few nights haven’t aid you well, have they? I’d be more than happy to hear what troubles you.” Ringabel said with a small smile, taking a seat next to him. For a brief second, Tiz’s eyes met his before returning to the ground again. Ringabel’s suggestion faded into the silence, and he turned his attention back to the distant light that came from outside. No one was awake except them. He looked over to Tiz, who still refused to look his way, and he came to the conclusion that he wasn’t getting an answer.

“I wish you’d open up to me.” Ringabel murmured, looking back at the ground. Silence fell between them again before Tiz pushed out a kept sigh.

“Am I not open already…?” He quietly said, grabbing his attention. A rather sad look flickered in his eyes and he gave a weak smile. “I can’t help but feel like I am an open book. I’m not very interesting at all. I doubt anyone would find me interesting enough to read… Do you not think the same?” He listlessly turned and caught the warm eyes of his friend, who only looked back at him with some kind of unreadable expression.

Ringabel felt slightly pressured once those eyes caught his own, and he found his words jumbled up in his throat. Chestnut colored orbs expectantly gazed back at him and he could feel his heart beat harder by each second… Oh, Crystals, what was he even going to say again? It seems he lost his train of thought, somehow.

Tiz watched him curiously, wondering what could’ve caught his words so suddenly. Ringabel realized his silence and cleared his throat. “A-apologies, but I can’t say I do. You spark my attention among the rest.” He smiled at the look of disbelief on the other’s face. “Want me to prove it?” Tiz narrowed his eyes, but felt up to the challenge.

“Tell me of all your woes. I promise I won’t fall asleep, and I’ll remember every word.” Ringabel smirked, despite his growing fatigue.

“All of them? We’d be here for hours.” Tiz shot back and chuckled at his own jest, despite knowing that it was certainly not a joke, less anything worth a giggle. He leaned his back against the grass and directed his attention to the silent night. Ringabel joined him soon enough. Together they looked up to the dark heavens and took in its beauty. The moon was the centerpiece to the painting that was the night sky. Misty clouds complimented the moon and the stars were delicately sprinkled throughout the sky. The stars, the moon, the clouds,  _ everything _ , made it as beautiful as it was, and wiped away the reality of the night; that they were actually just staring up at an empty black abyss. Ringabel found it truly amazing how cryptic the night was.

“The sky was so beautiful back home.” Tiz whispered, scared to speak any louder in case someone could hear. Although, Ringabel could hear him just fine. “It was so big and vast. We’d wake up early to take care of the animals and we’d see the first hours of dawn. As the sun comes up, the dark blue becomes a light purple, and then the sun brings in a creamy yellow.”

“Ah, yes. I remember when I first awoke, and the first thing I saw was the innocent crack of dawn.” Ringabel added with closed eyes, thinking back to his first day. “It really makes you forget evils that lurk in this world, doesn’t it?” He didn’t answer. He didn’t need to.

“Til… really loved waking up early to see the sunrise.” Tiz hesitated, but continued. “He’d wake me up in the middle of the night just to walk me up to the hill we always sat on. And we’d wait for hours.”

“… Is that your younger brother?” Ringabel asked gingerly, and judged the forlorn look on his friend’s face as a ‘yes’. “I can only imagine how hard it was…” He didn’t finish his sentence, nor did he have to. They spent the next few moments just looking up at the stars, listening to the rhythm of each other’s breathing.

“… Can you tell me more of your family?” Ringabel suddenly asked, but then quickly took it back. “O-only if you want to.”

“Oh… sure.” Tiz agreed, trying to break a smile. He turned back to the sky and took a deep breath. “Well…T-Til was very reckless. He always found a way to get himself into trouble… one way or another. Like… I remember this one time… where…” Tiz’s voice trailed off and he found himself wondering why. Why couldn’t he continue? All the good memories he had with his brother- he never wanted to forget them. He wanted his memory to live on within him. And he desperately wanted his friends to know how much Til meant to him- how much Til did that made his family happy. So why?

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” Ringabel reassured him.

_ But I do want to tell you. _

Tiz could only bite his lip and nod. “Then there’s my parents… they were really loving and kind to us. My dad liked bringing the family together for Sunday meals- he was such a good cook. He always had us help in the kitchen, even though… Til hated cooking… but he didn’t care. He said that there was always some fun to be had while making a good meal.”

Ringabel hummed in response. “Sounds like you two were rather close.”

“Not… really.” Tiz rebutted. “He was closer to Til than he was with me… I was actually closer to my ma. She fell under a bad illness after Til was born, so she couldn’t do much farm work. After a few years, she was immobilized. She didn’t talk much, but I know how much she cared.”

For a split second, Ringabel saw the image of a familiar woman lying in a hospital bed. She stared up at him and smiled sweetly, before closing her eyes and laying her head back down against the bed. A wave of pain pulsed through his head, fading away the mysterious image and leaving him to let out a pain-stricken cry.

“R-Ringabel?!” Tiz sat up and tended to his hurting friend, hunched over and clutching his head. “Ringabel! What’s happening with you?!” He reached over and tried to touch his shoulder, but he just jerked away and curled up on his side.

“That…!” Ringabel choked out. The pain that resided in his head slowly began to fade, and soon he could see clearly again. “…sounds absolutely a-awful.” The next few seconds went by at a snail’s pace for Tiz, and he hesitated at reaching over once more. This time, he was stopped with the meek lift of a hand.

“P-please, I’m fine… My head was just attacked with a  _ horrendous _  migraine.” Ringabel wiped the sweat off his forehead. What was left of his headache was a droning pain that lingered at the back of his head.

“You really scared me just now.” Tiz sighed, returning to his original position.

“Don’t worry, I seem to be alright now.” Ringabel gave a pitiful smile. He had to wonder if he believed himself. He’d been attacked by headaches before, and that was one of the worst cases yet. He didn’t know who he truly saw in that moment, but her face looked so familiar to him. The only person he could trace that face to was… Edea? But why would she be… in a hospital bed? And why did it hurt him so bad to think about it?

“Guess I’m not the only one who’s on edge here.” Tiz joked as Ringabel settled back beside him.

“Apparently not.” The older man replied, shaking his head and saving his lingering thoughts for another entry in the journal. “Anyways, I wish to hear more, if you can, at least.”

“If you really want to know…”

Tiz first started with his hometown.

He talked about how, despite the back-breaking work and messy animals, having a farm really was special. The crops his family grew were handled with great care, and they always prayed that the weather would be kind to their soil. Sometimes a drought would loom over and it’d be nearly impossible to grow anything, but the one thing that Norende had that nowhere else had was unity. Everyone knew each other and everyone cared for one another. Everyone was like one happy family, so it made up for how small the village was. In times of extreme weather, everyone would join together to shelter one another and protect the kids.

“That… that sounds better than I imagined it would. Although, I can’t see myself ever coming near manure,” Ringabel said, shuddering at the thought of it.

“You get used to it, trust me.” Tiz giggled. His smile promptly faded when he saw a rather sad look on his friend’s face. “What’s wrong?”

“Ah, nothing, nothing…” Ringabel reassured. Seeing that his answer didn’t satisfy the bumpkin, he heaved a gloomy sigh. “I was just thinking about how nice it must’ve been. To have a family, I mean.”

Silence fell over the two of them and Tiz gave a small shrug. “I’m sure you have a family… somewhere. Once you regain your memories, you should be able to find them.”

“Ah, yes, I’m sure of that. But what if my memories never return, hm?” He pondered to himself, leaning back to where his back touched the grass. Tiz looked back and saw a pained expression on his face. “What if I never get the answers that I’m searching for? Who am I, and why am I here? Why am I on this journey with you all? Why does this book,” he lifted up D’s Journal, “depict of what becomes of you all?”

Tiz leaned back and laid by Ringabel side to side. He stared at him as he glared up at the night sky, searching for something that could not be found. He sighed and turned his head to the his friend. “What of me then, Tiz?”

He stared into Ringabel’s hazel eyes and only then could he see how empty they were.

“… W-well,” he began nervously, “you can stay with us. Are we not your friends at this point?”

“I’m sure we are now, but once we restore the Crystals, Agnès will return to her duties once more and Edea will have plenty of things to sort through. You will certainly be busy, what with rebuilding your village, and all. Surely, I’ll just become a distant memory.”

Tiz wasn’t very good at comforting; he used to be very good at consoling others, but he’s long forgotten how to make someone crack even the tiniest of smiles.  “They won’t forget you. We won’t forget each other. We’re only just starting our journey.”

“I can only hope that’s true.” Ringabel sighed and closed his eyes. Tiz saw that he couldn’t help ward off the dark thoughts that plagued his friend, but he figured the least he could do was listen to them. “You know, I think about these things on a daily basis; about what’ll become of me once the world is returned to the way it was before.” He placed his hands on his stomach and stared up at the stars. “I’ve nowhere to go, you see.”

“You say that as if I won’t be here.” Tiz stopped him in his tracks. “I’ll gladly see to it that there’s a place fit for you. It’ll even be in my village, if you want!”

Ringabel coughed, taken aback by the offer. “H-honestly that’s far too gener-”

“Yes, that’ll do.” Tiz spoke again. “A decent sized house, one you could call your own- and you’d build your life up from there. A long, happy life, with a family of your own.” He smiled and looked over. “Sounds nice, doesn’t it?”

No words came to reply. At first it was a few seconds, then a few minutes, then several. Tiz swallowed hard and found the silence unbearable.

“I’ll be heading to bed then.” He said in a nervous tone.Before he could push himself to stand up, his arm was taken by another hand.

“S-so soon? Please, stay a little while longer.” Ringabel looked at him with desperate eyes screaming for him to stay.

And he did stay. Just a little while longer.

**_xoxo_ **

“ _ No.”  _ Ringabel grumble through gritted teeth, scribbling over the sketch he was making in his book. He shook his head and moved to another blank spot on the page. “This time I should start with his eyes.”

…

“ _ No.”  _ He grumbled again, this time he tore the page right out of his book and tossed it to the side of his bed. “I just can’t get it right, but I remember it so perfectly.”

Ringabel leaned back in his chair and gave an exhausted sigh. It shouldn’t be this hard to sketch this picture, but  _ damnit _ , he just couldn’t get it right. Everytime he started to draw it, something would be off. It just wouldn’t look… like how he saw it.

He gave a frustrated huff and folded his arms. He should’ve drawn the scene the night it happened. When Tiz lied there with the bouquet of flowers. He had the perfect view of it and everything; curse it all.

He picked up his pen and began again, this time determined to get it right. He started with the Peony and drew outwards. He placed the pen at a point to draw his eye and stopped, closing his eyes to picture the scene again. Tiz laid there so perfectly, peace radiating from his being. His body would slowly move up and down with his breathing. His arms daintily grasping the flowers as he rested there.

Ringabel opened his eyes and started again.

There were much more things about Tiz that had to be accounted for, he noted. His skin was quite soft; it would be a crime to make it come across as anything but. And then his hair- his hair was certainly messy, but it’s not the type of messy that you just scribble down on the paper and call it a day.  _ No. _  It was better than that. Everything had to look  _ perfect,  _ or else-

“..argh!” Ringabel groaned tearing yet another paper out of his book before placing his forehead down on the pages.

-There would be a chance he’d forget how absolutely adorable he looked that night.

Ringabel pulled himself up and stared at roughed crease where the paper had torn. He frowned to himself as picked up his pen again to write.

_ “He will become the death of me, at this rate.” _

**_xoxo_ **

Words could not express just how much Ringabel resented his position of being the pilot. Staying up to monitor the ship was busy work, and while he occasionally got visits from the others who would come over to check on him, he was mostly left by himself as his friends rested or polished up their weapons.

He knew that Agnès preferred to stay below and sort through her things to make sure they were organized. Edea would mostly be eating away at some food, and if not, she’d be training by herself. Then, of course, Tiz would always be looming around here and there. He enjoyed it when he would come and keep him company whilst he pilots. He kept his mind off things, especially the dark thoughts that would often sneak up at him at the worst of times. Unfortunately, now was one of those times. How many times had they awakened the Crystals? And how many times have they met the same foes?

How many times has he seen his own face, twisted in pain and disbelief, fall to his doom?

More times than he’d care to admit.

Yet the more times they do as Airy says, the worse Ringabel seemed to feel. Often he’d go to bed and be haunted with strange dreams, plagued with all these familiar voices that he had definitely heard before, but had no idea  _ who they belonged to.  _ Painful dreams would greet him at night, and he’d be clueless as to why they were sad. Dreams of conversations that made no sense, yet he still  _ felt _  regret for the things he did… the things he said. Were these truly just dreams? Or something more elaborate? Just thinking about it made his head spin.

“You look terrible.” A soft voice said from behind him. Ringabel looked over and saw Tiz standing by the entrance, holding a small mug in his hands. He chuckled softly.

“Is it that noticeable?” he asked bitterly.

“Very.” Tiz walked over and handed him the cup. “I made you some coffee. Looks like you really need it.”

“Ah, thank you!” Ringabel happily took the drink and sipped the bitter drink, sending a jolt of warm shivers up his spine. Tiz smiled.

“You already look a lot better. Better than me, at least.” He sighed and leaned himself against Ringabel’s side. They were both tired, surely this was fine.    
Seeing as how Ringabel didn’t protest to the movement, he stayed. “Doesn’t it get tiring staying up here the whole time? Why not just put it on autopilot?” He murmured into his shoulder.

“Mmm…” Ringabel hummed, setting his cup down. “I don’t want us to get caught off guard by any sort of enemy. I’ve just really been on edge lately.”

“I can tell.” Was all Tiz said, resting his hand on the other's arm. He felt Ringabel loosen under his touch and it made him feel… weird. It was a foreign feeling, being able to soothe someone with just a touch. He had long forgotten what that felt like.. but if it made Ringabel happy, he’d gladly stand by his side.

_ And besides,  _ he thought as he listened to his own heartbeat grow in speed,  _ I do so love how he smells. _  
  


**_xoxo_ **

“Come now, Tiz, are you really trying to tell me that you have no feelings for Agnès? Not even a little?” Ringabel pressed, raising his eyebrows. Tiz glanced off over Grandship and into the ocean waters below them. They swished and swerved beneath them. It was another one of those slow, tiring days. The ones where no progress was being done, no progress could be done, and everyone felt the toll this adventure had on them.

“I can’t say I do.” He shrugged. These were the days when Ringabel would talk the most-to combat the silence that plagued their small party. There wasn’t much to speak about, but he always found something. “Not that I would want to, anyway.”

“But why wouldn’t you? In the most appropriate way possible, I can say that she has a divine beauty that any man would be lucky to be beside.” He gently turned the wheel of the ship. Lately it felt  _ different _ . Usually, the small conversations he’d have with Tiz were comforting, but nothing too major. In these coming weeks, he’d almost feel…  _ lacking,  _ if Tiz did not accompany his side.

Tiz gave a small sigh and leaned his cheek against his hand, gazing at nothing in particular. Ringabel studied his features, feeling something akin to a feather tickle his heart. He almost felt inspired to drop the wheel and take out his book for a quick sketch, as if this was the perfect time.

“Maybe I’m not one to care about beauty…” The sentence trailed off as Tiz looked into the waves. There was something hidden in the air they couldn't put their finger on.

“Oh? Well, I can say that she has inner beauty as well.” Ringabel gave him a light pat on the shoulder, heedlessly ignoring the slight jump the other had at his touch. “A great mind and a kind heart- she’s _  perfect  _ for you, I would think.” He almost choked on that last sentence. It didn’t sit right with him, but what he really wanted to say would be much too dangerous.

Tiz paused for a moment, picking at the chipped pieces of wood and flicking them off.  “After everything is over, I can't see myself finding anyone.”

A moment of silence passed as Ringabel tried to process what was said, only managing give a small, “Huh?”

“Maybe love is just not for me.” He felt a sudden jerk in motion coming from the grand ship. Ringabel quickly snatched the wheel and turned it back to its proper course. They could hear the muffled complaints and grumbles coming from the others.

“W-what? What nonsense are you speaking right now? You’re just going to remain alone for the rest of your days?! What prompted you to make such a horribly stupid decision?” Ringabel sputtered as he felt overwrought with different emotions and thoughts, maybe unjustly so.

“Ringabel, you’re really-”

“Oh, I can’t even imagine how lonely of a life that’d be! It almost makes me tear up just thinking about it! Tell me Tiz- who scorned you? This kind of drastic decision must have come from somewhere!”

Was it really all that drastic? Why did he care all of a sudden? “... I just don’t… want to be with anyone. That’s that.”

Ringabel shook his head and focused on piloting. “This is… a heinous crime, on your part. You could make a woman very happy one day.”  _ And it’s just not fair. _

“And what about you?” Tiz shot back, more aggressive than he desired. “All you do is flirt around with women-”

“-And let me remind you that this conversation is about you, not me.” He flipped the ship on autopilot and stalked towards him. Tiz found himself being backed into the doorway.

“ _ Why _  are you getting so mad?”

“I’m not mad, I just want to know why.” He couldn’t shake the feeling that this wasn’t right. Not that the decision was wrong, but the person making the decision was wrong. “It just seems like such a waste.” Or maybe Tiz was just being selfish, keeping himself away from someone who could very well fill his life with joy.

Ringabel softened his gaze.  _ I want to be that someone. _

“A waste?” Tiz looks puzzled, tilting his head in confusion. He looked absolutely adorable doing so.

_ Absolutely adorable.  _ “Missing out on a slew of romances? Never quite getting rid of that loneliness?” He leaned over just a bit more. Tiz didn’t know how to interpret that look in his eye. “And of course, you miss out on that little spark you get when you have your first kiss.” He placed both of his hands on either side of his face, cradling his cheeks between his fingers. Yes. He was being selfish, Tiz’s expression slowly turned calm as he touched the hands that held his face. His eyes closed and he tilted his head up to accept the awaited kiss. Ringabel felt his heart jump- he was going to let him do it. He was going to let him kiss him.

_ Wait. _

He was going to kiss Tiz. Right then, right there.

All of the heat in his body gathered up to his cheeks, and he could feel them reddening with each second. His hands trembled against his soft skin, yet he didn’t back away. He leaned closer, both of their breathing becoming more and more frantic. Tilting his head, he could feel his breath on his lips.

_ So close… _

…but he did not seal the gap.

Tiz slowly opened his eyes and saw Ringabel’s retreating figure return to the wheel.

“M-my apologies… you should go.” He shakily said. After a few seconds, he could faintly hear the closing of a door behind him, and he felt his knees give out from under him. Kneeling to the floor, he lightly pressed his forehead against the wheel of the ship. Letting out a groan he’d been holding in all this time, he could only utter a painful, “D-Damn it…”

**_xoxo_ **

After a few questionable faints and heated arguments in the group, Ringabel was found at the deck of the ship, pacing back and forth. The others kept their distance, so that he may get some much needed fresh air. Lately, he’d been acting much differently; much more serious.

He’d zone out more often than not, often leading to a spark in Edea’s ire or a petty scolding from Airy. Agnès would bite her tongue for Airy’s sake, and Tiz went back to closing himself off in his bunker for most of the day. He’d only peek out whenever food was served, and sometimes he’d still skip dinner. He would miss out on the gang’s daily grinds- but at this point, they all had stopped going on their usual group spars against the wild. This resulted in a terrible downturn in their skills and power.

Edea’s strength was only managed due to her stress training, but she’d still find it difficult to concentrate when she was all by herself. Crystals forbid her sudden demise- one time she was terribly injured on the outskirts of Eisen, only to be saved last minute by a tear-stricken Agnès.

Agnès’ magic abilities were terribly depleting, and her strength was also faltering. She could only focus on the next objective ahead- awakening the next Crystal. No matter how many times they cycled through the same routine through each world, she could only look ahead. Everyone could see just how quickly her faith was draining, but decided not to say anything in fear that she might snap.

Airy was questionable.

Ringabel was questioning.

The group was becoming a mess, and although their trust in each other was stronger than ever, their sanity felt paper thin.

Tiz dreamt of something evil one of these nights.

As he laid his head against his pillow, he only saw a hopeless world. The Crystals were dark and festered with evil, the water was pitch black and there was no wind that cycled through the air.

All of their efforts.

For nothing.

The chasm stayed present and gaping- practically mocking him.

And he stood there, watching it all, with no one in sight; except himself and the hopeless world.

When he awoke, he didn’t cry. He simply shuffled out of bed and left his bunker, expecting to see his friends outside strategizing their next move. Instead, he saw an empty ship, and the dark night that awaited him. He seemed to have overslept- and once again, missed dinner. Except, he was too much in a daze to go fetch himself some food. He needed something to clear his head- and  _ damn it _ , he was really starting to hate being airborne.

Distant footsteps pulled him out of his daze, and he saw Ringabel’s figure pacing at the top of the stairs. Thinking, and only thinking. Just how many hours has he been up there?

Tiz was tempted to return to his bed, not wanting to face his friend; not after  _ that  _ happened.

But at the same time, he was beginning to worry for him. His mood had taken a drastic turn, and truth be told, he missed the old Ringabel.

Swallowing his fears, he went to the top of the deck where he was silently pacing back and forth. Ringabel noticed him, and for a brief moment Tiz saw hesitation in his eyes.

“Ah, Tiz. Rather chilly tonight, wouldn’t you agree?” His voice was low and raspy; he hadn’t talked all day. “It would do no good to be out in your sleepwear, would it?”

Tiz stared at him with distant eyes, “You’ve been pacing up here for hours,” he said.

Ringabel waved him off and shook his head. “I can assure to you I’m fine. I just… needed some fresh air, alone with my thoughts.”

_ For hours?  _ “Oh… well, if you don’t mind, I’d like to join you,” he said meekly, looking to the ground. He shouldn’t feel so uncomfortable talking to him of all people.

“Please, by all means.”

The two of them stood there on the deck, listening to the gentle whistle the wind chimed. It would usually feel good to have each other's company on such a lonely occasion, but it was obvious there was something much colder between them besides the air. There was a part of Tiz that wanted to leave and return to his lonesome- at least then he wouldn’t have to face the tension that had stained their friendship for quite some time now-

He let out an irritated huff.

-but he  _ couldn’t.  _ He refused to let something so immature stop him from standing by one of his closest companions, especially in his time of need.

Tiz’s thoughts were cut off by the growing sounds of grumbling. He traced his eyes over and saw Ringabel hunched over the railing, his hand clutching the side of his head and gripping some of his hair that, on any other occasion would look no less than perfect, but now looked messy and unkempt. As the pain visibly died down, the older man’s breathing settle and, out of defeat, hung his head.

“... You’ve been having a lot of migraines lately. In these past few days, you’ve cried out in your sleep and fainted at random times. We’ve been worried about your health…” Tiz told him as he made his way to his side. He placed a hand on his back and leaned over to be eye level with him. “Ringabel, I-”

“Please, fret not, there really is no need to worry, Tiz.” Ringabel jolted up, knocking off the hand on him. He tried to shoot a small smile but it faltered after a few moments of crushing silence. “Aha… or maybe there is, I’m not sure. I’ve gained back my memories.”

_ His memories? That’s great news!,  _ Tiz thought, but judging by the silence that preceded that statement, it was safe to presume that something was very wrong.

\--

“I see…” Tiz started after listening to all that he said. “...That’s… a lot to take in…”

“You see… why I’ve been up here for quite some time.” Ringabel sighed, folding his arms.    
“I do have a favor to ask of you, though.” Tiz looked up at him; just seeing his eyes look back at him so expectantly… no, Ringabel couldn’t allow his words to be caught in his throat again.

“A favor?” Tiz stepped forward, treating it as some sort of secret.

“I need you to relay this information back to Agnès.” He told him. “Sometime-someplace where Airy is not around. Will you do this for me?” Ringabel felt worry pool into his stomach. I part of him was screaming that telling him all this was a mistake-who could believe such a drastic tale anyway? And with little proof to back it up? He was firmly ready for some form of disbelief to cross the other’s face, something that never occured. Instead, he got a nod of approval.

“Of course I will.” Tiz affirmed without hesitation.

“Really? You’ll believe me?”  _ But why would you not question me? _

“Ringabel, with how much we’ve been through, I have no reason to believe that you’d lie to me.” He gave him a small smile. “And… in any case, this game has been going on long enough. We’re all tired, and I’m ready for this little adventure to finally be over. I’m willing to try anything at this point.”

Ever since he’d woken up, Ringabel had felt the largest weight resting on his shoulders. The information that he carried was enough to tear apart the group, and he knew that if he hadn’t said anything, it would have come out at the wrong time. To feel reassured that his memories were believed… well, a good amount of the worry that he kept within himself just evaporated into thin air.

With a relieved sigh, Ringabel gave a weak smile, “Thank you, Tiz. Really.”

“You already look so much better after saying all that, hehe..” Tiz said with a hint of joy touching his words.

“I sadly cannot say the same for you.” Ringabel said, walking over and adjusting the roughed up collar of the large shirt he wore. “Really, Tiz, why would you allow the world to see you like  _ this?”  _ Tiz chuckled slightly as the other picked lint out his hair.

“I, uh.. Really didn’t sleep too well this time.” He confessed. Ringabel’s smile faded. “I haven’t been sleeping well at all lately.”

“I thought you were finally rid of those horrid dreams?” Ringabel asked him. Tiz shrugged, feeling his throat tighten up as he felt the other’s hands touch him. Unable to take it, he swiftly grabbed Ringabel’s hands and forced them to stop- leaving him with nothing more than chilling eye contact.

“I-I.. well! They seemed to have returned when you left my side..” Tiz felt a part of him crumble under that gaze. “At night! When I wake up! That’s what I meant…” He couldn’t continue to look at him for much longer, so he quickly averted his eyes to the floor boards. He heard Ringabel clear his throat after seconds went by.

“Ah, of c-course! Well, I’d be more than happy to accompany you again, if you wish!” That was his cheery voice, but it certainly didn’t cheer up Tiz’s mood. He knew that even if Ringabel came back to sleep by his side, those nightmares would probably come back again. He just knew it. So  _ why  _ did it work before?

Tiz only then realized  _ who’s  _ hands he was holding and dropped them instantly.

“I'm sorry!” He quickly apologized and stepped back. “You probably wanna be left alone again. I'll head to sleep.” He made a move to turn but his shoulder was grabbed.

“Stay. Please. Your company is needed.”  _ I need your company. _

Tiz breathed out a sigh and nodded. He let Ringabel slide his hand down from his shoulder to his arm down to his hand, and allowed himself to be led away from where they were.

“Where are we going?” Tiz asked quietly. He instinctively clenched his hand.

“Nowhere really. Just to get some much needed fresh air.” Ringabel answer, smiling-it was a tired smile, but a smile nonetheless. Tiz couldn't help but feel good about causing that again.

\--

The two of them rested together on the ship, lying on their backs and staring up at the stars. The wood floor was uncomfortable at first, but it was worth the ease of all the stress. Edea and Agnès were asleep in their chambers, and the only thing that sounded between them were the rushing waves and the whistling wind. It was just like that night, oh so long ago, where they watched the sky together and listened to each other until the crack of dawn. Yes, it was just like that night. But that was then, and this was now, and Ringabel couldn’t find it in himself to hold back anymore.

“Tiz, why do you like to torture me so much?”

“What do you mean?” He looked over and saw a look in Ringabel’s eyes he hadn’t seen before.

“I’ve been at a loss for quite some time. Lately, all of my thoughts have been centered on you.”

“M-me?” Tiz choked out, feeling his heart throb.  __ It was happening again. It was happening  _ now. _

Tiz swallowed hard and averted his gaze back to the stars. How beautiful and captivating they were. He cursed each and every one of them, and especially the moon- for they all displayed his rosy cheeks for all to see.

“Whenever I wake up, the first thing I think about is saying good morning to you. I always think about you whenever I get dressed or drink my coffee. I’m always thinking of new things to say that’ll make you smile. And I take pride in catching a chuckle out of you.” Ringabel closed his eyes, thinking of the next thing to say, yet nothing came to mind.

“W-well… um…” Tiz felt his words jumble up in his throat.

Regardless, Ringabel continued. “This kind of infatuation is an interesting one, indeed. It’s not like how I felt when I first saw Edea, nor the way I felt for the women of Florem. No, it’s much graver than that-” Ringabel took a sharp breath and opened his eyes. “I have no idea what to call it.”

Ringabel averted his eyes and bit his lip. Just where was he taking this conversation? He had reached a dead end, and so they laid in the unbearable silence for a few more dreadful moments.

Tiz knew that this conversation was bound to happen sooner or later. It had been hard to concentrate lately with the sudden change of atmosphere between them. The quick conversations, the awkward stolen glances, the hidden tension; it was starting to become insufferable.

“Well…” Tiz was the one to break the silence, “Thank you? I’ve never had someone give me that much thought.” He looked over and saw the man still staring up. “Y..y’know, the act is reciprocated on my end as well! Don’t think it’s just you!” He felt his stomach tie up in little knots. He really should stop talking.

“Y-you have?” Ringabel was now looking at him- the moment he locked his eyes with his, he couldn’t look away. He almost forgot to blink.

Tiz swallowed his fear and continued, “I… I look forward to talking with you every day. You’re so easy to talk to, much better than me… You ease me from my nightmares… but that’s what friends do… they care and worry about each other.”

“Ah, yes, but do friends stay up throughout the night thinking of one another?” the Casanova rebutted, raising a brow. “Because if so, I can’t help but feel slightly jealous another person captivates your mind.” He chuckled to himself, inching his fingers over to his hand.

Tiz smiled. “… Perhaps they do, if they are particularly close.” He felt warm fingers trail up the back of his hand.

“But just how close can two friends be before that line is crossed?” Those fingers slipped between his own and closed the gaps.

“You ask me as if I’m supposed to know.”

His words hung in the air for the next few moments.

“I don’t just want to worry about you, Tiz. I wish to protect you.” He squeezed his hand.

Tiz’s breath felt caught within his throat. He bashfully choked out, “I-I dont need protection! Really, other people deserve yo-” He sentenced was silenced by the feeling of a hand cupping his cheek. His eyes widened, feeling the same way he did before when he was backed up into the door. Ringabel first looked serious, as if he was still trying to answer his own questions about how he felt. Then, he broke into one of his signature smiles.

“Tiz, you must forgive me. I rudely played with your emotions that other night and it’s certainly unlike me to do so!” He traced his fingers down his cheek to under his chin. Tiz couldn’t move, feeling paralyzed under his strong gaze. “But, you see, the reason I didn’t go through with it that night was because… well! I clearly wasn’t ready to handle your nature!”

“My  _ what? _ ” Tiz sputtered, his heart pounding harder as Ringabel inched closer.

“And again, you’ll have to forgive me once more! You’re eyes have the power to smite any man you please! I do hope you understand that  _ I can’t push you away anymore _ .”

Their lips pressed against each other softly. Tiz closed his eyes and sighed into the kiss, feeling all of the butterflies in his stomach flutter away. His lips were soft and his kisses were gentle, stripping away all of his worries and all his pain. He wrapped his arms around his waist and Ringabel tilted his head slightly and leaned in deeper. His lips were cracked and rough, but also warm and tender against his. Tiz pulled away first, prompting a small whine that came from Ringabel. He opened his eyes and viewed those eyes that only saw love in him.

“I… I love you,” he whispered, barely audible to himself. Ringabel bit his lip nervously, but then leaned over until his mouth grazed over his ear.

“ _ I love you too.” _  Tiz tightened his grip and pulled him into a tight embrace. One that he didn’t want to pull away from. He wanted to stay like this. Forever. With Ringabel.  
  


**_xoxo_ **

It happened.

They didn’t want to believe it, but it happened.

The four of them… how did the four of them manage to fall the ghastly trap that Airy devised? It seemed so obvious, looking back at their journey. But alas, what’s done was done. There was nothing left to be said.

They knew they had to stop her now, and as the tale tells, they will.

But not now. Now was the time for grieving. Each of them scattered, needing time to compose themselves over what they just witnessed. Perhaps if they were in their right state of mind, they’d take this moment to figure out a plan to get them out of this mess. But not now.

Tiz found himself looking off the brim of the Grandship and getting lost in the steady waves. He looked at his reflection that stared back at him with cold eyes. He would glare at the man staring back at him and call him a fool; if only that man wasn’t himself.

“I can’t believe…” His throat felt dry, but he knew that water couldn’t make it any better. “… I’ve been so  _ stupid _ .” Teardrops fell into the sea below. Tiz could only watch as they fell helplessly down, and even debated joining them.

How much damage has he truly caused? How many innocent lives have been taken because of what he’s done? Bringing Agnès, Edea and Ringabel together was all his doing, and if it wasn’t for him, they wouldn’t have made it this far. The very thing he’s been trying to prevent- the deaths, the destruction, the chasm… has all been his doing.

This whole time, he’d try to keep the group intact. When their journey seemed bleak, he was there to bring their spirits up. All the while, holding in his ugly cries until night fell upon him. When they were all asleep, he could finally let go of such a pointless act and be free to cry.

“Agnès…!” But right now, the ship was empty.

“Edea…!” And no one was there.

“…R-Ringabel!” And he screamed and sobbed, hoping someone, anyone, could finally hear him and reach out. But, of course, this time no one did. And even if they did, would they even listen?

“Ringabel...!” His knees gave away at the weight of all the worlds he held on his shoulders and he fell to the ship’s floor. He fell over his hands and wept onto the bare wood. Sniffling and whimpering by his lonesome, he must’ve looked so pathetic. Not that anyone could even see.

Not that anyone was even there.

“Ringabel, please!” He hoped and prayed to whatever that cared that Ringabel would be there; that he would see him and hold him. He would take him out of the dark place that he had fallen into. He’d make him smile again, because he had that power over him. Ringabel knew how to do it, and no one else did.

But he wasn’t there.  _ Not this time. _

_ \-- _

_ “ _ I’m sorry. I’m  _ so sorry _ , Ringabel.” Tiz’s muffled sobs was cacophonous to Ringabel’s own ears, yet he made no effort to push him away nor stop his cries. He simply sat there, staring the wall in front of them with sore eyes. His hand rested on Tiz’s head, occasionally moving to give a reassuring rub, but other than that, he did nothing. He couldn’t find the energy to move.

“I told her wha-what you said-- about A-Airy--but she st-still-” Ringabel pushed Tiz’s head back down to his chest. He didn’t want to hear this anymore.

“Stop. What happened was no one’s fault- not you, nor Agnès  could have predicted such… terrible outcome.” He told him, trying to keep his voice steady, with little success.

Except for  _ him. _  If he had just remembered everything just a little bit sooner, if he had trust his gut- if only he voiced his thoughts-  maybe, just maybe, this could have been avoided. He shut his eyes to hold back the tears; they fell anyway.

He choked out a few sobs, clutching Tiz and holding him closer, knowing that soon enough they could be walking to their graves. He felt a hand touch his face and he opened his eyes. He could make out the blurry image of his lover looking back at him, and this point, it’s all he has-

And all he needs.

Unable to contain himself any further, Ringabel hungrily locked his lips with him. He pulled him close and refused to let go. Tiz could hardly keep up with the frantic kisses that pecked his lips as his own hands wandered the man’s back, desperately and frantically feeling to make sure that he was still there. This time he could  _ feel it _ , Ringabel  _ was  _ there.

Tiz felt himself being pushed down onto the bed; not too rough, just enough to grab his attention. He feathered kisses all over Ringabel’s face. He reached up and placed his hands on his cheeks, looking into his beautiful eyes that never tore from his. His fair skin he caressed the nights they fell asleep together and beautiful lips that knew how to soothe his ears. He regretted not taking every moment of his time to gaze at the beauty that was his lover. Why did it take him so long to realize who he wanted beside him?

Ringabel found himself losing himself in his darling’s features. How smooth, yet bruised, his skin was. He wanted to kiss every part of his skin and relieve him of his wounds. His chestnut eyes, puffy and red due to the tears he was forced to shed in the shadows. He wanted to wipe his tears away forever, so that his eyes may shine only for him. His ever so lovely lips, soft and plump, that quivered ever so gently when he was nervous. He’d kiss them all day so that he may never hear his sobs again. His hands; the ones that held him through times of pain and agony. He’d kiss them each day just so he knew how much he appreciated all he did. Everything about his Love was perfect- why did he deny these feelings for so long?

Ringabel leaned into his love’s neck and placed chaste kisses all over, whispering faint  _ I love you _ s with each one. Tiz pulled him up and hastily took his lips once more.

“Don’t… Ever… Leave…” Tiz moaned between each kiss.

“Never.” Ringabel lied, exploring his hands down the torso of his dearest.

Now wasn’t the time for regrets.

**_xoxo_ **

“Ah… finally.” The words echoed around, but only one man heard them. “I did it. It’s just how I remembered it.”

The blonde beaut gazed at his own work. He was rather impressed with himself. He generally considered his silly doodles to be messy and rushed. But this one was different. The ink wasn't smudged, not a single line was out of place, everything fell in it's correct place. Not having it cramped in his tiny little book was also a plus.

_ Yes, something like this deserves to be full sized. _

But  _ Crystals _ , does it take a while. Maybe if he had the free time, he’d consider doing art full-time. Although, he doubt it’d be a very fruitful career. Not only is his schedule rather busy with  _ other matters _ , he wouldn't be able to draw anything else besides-

_ No matter,  _ he thought. _  I'll draw you countless times if i must. I don't care how long it takes. I won't allow myself to forget. _

_ Oh… I'm crying again.. What a pity, and here I thought I was going to be strong. _

Ringabel nearly snapped his pen in half with how hard he was clutching it. He held his head down and let out a stifled sob; but he only allowed himself the one.

_ How dreary it is… to sit here and think about all the nice times we shared… all the laughing and even the silent times… To think, it would lead to this. _

“Forgive me, love… I can't bear to do anything more to this piece in fear I'll ruin it. Perhaps one day I'll even add color, one day when I’m stronger- worthy for you to call your own- but not now.” he brought a finger up to the artwork and traced a hand down it. “If you'll excuse me… I must rest. Hopefully, my dreams will grace me with your presence, yet again.”

Ringabel threw a sheet over the canvas.  _ Until we meet again darling. _


End file.
